Thursday, June 15, 2006


After doing in my ankle this past Saturday, I'm glad to say that the healing process has been much quicker than I expected. I had a meeting this morning in Mississauga and I wasn't sure if I would be able to drive being that I have a manual transmission. Aside from some stiffness, it worked out for the most part. On my way back, my ankle started to hurt so I popped some Ibuprofen and I was cheddar and have been riding on cloud 9 the rest of the day.

Although the drugs help, I'm still in a bit of a predicament. Right now, I've got stuff stored in Melissa's basement and Randy's garage. I'm supposed to move in tomorrow, and from what I remember, there's a serious set of stairs I need to climb in order to get to my place. With all the crap I need to move, it's gonna take me a while. Fortunately, Rachel has said that she could help me move, which is gonna be a HUGE help. I think I'm just gonna move ths stuff I need like my clothes and guitars, and once my ankle gets a bit stronger, move the rest in later. But this brings me to something I've been pondering these past few days.

I've grown accustomed to being relatively independent that I'm actually having a really hard time accepting the help of others when I can't pitch in. I have no problem accepting peoples' help when I'm pulling my own weight, but when I'm in a predicament that has left me incapacitated and needing to rely on the help of others, it feels weird. I feel like a failure when I'm helpless and unable to do anything. But as I've been thinking about this, I was reminded about the relationship humanity has with God. When it comes to the salvific and redemptive acts of Jesus through the incarnation, death and resurrection, we are all helpess beings. There's nothing we can do that Jesus has not already done except respond to His gestures of love and grace. I am reminded of what Martin Luther says about infant baptism. He says 'It was in the child to be baptized that the meaning of Evangelical faith became visible: trusting only in the "alien" justification granted by God; acting out of the "alien", the new conscience, and living on the intercession of others...Baptism only becomes a sacrament, a visible pledge of God's fidelity instituted by Christ through the promise He made [because] the "ignorant" child is not baptized because of its faith but because of God's promise.'

Because I am still wrestling with the need to let go of my inherent control-freak self, perhaps having sprained my ankle will teach me to rely less on myself and more on God and on others.


At 10:49 PM, Anonymous krista said...

Let us help! When are you moving? Let us know and we'll see what we can do!

At 12:35 PM, Blogger Jaci said...

Kevin I know the feeling! We moved three weeks before the wedding and I had been off work for 2 months with a bad back. I felt awful asking for help.

Same with my surgery. Everyone offered food and all sorts of things and I can't bring myself to say yes for the most part. I just feel as though other people could use the help more, when really sometimes I should just say yes thank you and shut up. Nice to know others struggle with the same things!

Glad your ankle is doing a bit better!


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