Tuesday, March 27, 2007


During my trip to Texas, I found myself talking about implants with someone. I don't know how we got onto the subject, but one thing led to another and I started making up this totally absurd story. It went like this:

Me: You know how some women go get breast implants? Well some guys get calf implants.
Her: No they don't!!
Me: They do!!! In fact, I have calf implants right now.
Her: Shut up!!
Me: Honest to goodness. Look at these suckers!! Tell me that they don't look natural.
Her: Well... But why'd you get them?
Me: Actually, I got them a while ago. When I was younger, I was really, really vane. One year near my birthday, my grandpa asked me what I wanted for my birthday, and I told him that I wanted calf implants. And since my grandpa loved us 3 boys so much, he did whatever he could to spoil us, so he paid for my implants.
Her: He did?
Me: Yup. You can actually see one of the scars that was left from the incision made by the surgeon. It's right here on my left calf. (Fortunately for me, I actually have a scar in the perfect place from a little accident I had in Mexico where I got cut by a piece of rope while trying to step over it.)
Her: That's crazy!! Did it hurt?
Me: Not really.

At first, I thought that the person I was talking to would eventually realize that I was talking out my ass the entire time. But it wasn't until lunch the next day that I found out how believable my story was to her. Or perhaps it wasn't the story, but her gullibility.

Either way, my friend whom I duped, Connie, sent me an email today with a link to this website saying 'Just for future reference, in case you change your mind.'


At 9:08 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

what is the world coming to?!

At 9:00 PM, Blogger tim shaw said...

i think johnny drama (entourage) got those...


Post a Comment

<< Home